11. Philadelphia – the final chapter

So we head, again, back to the land we adore, the city of brotherly (and sisterly) love…..

PHILADELPHIA!

It’s Andre’s first chance to be in our home town and he will spend his first day here watching over the health and safety of 7 children.

That’s right, I’m taking off again!  Every year for about 4 or 5 years my good friend Heather and I have had a Mom’s Day Out.  Of course, we planned on doing it for this trip and I’d been looking forward to it for months (or possibly ever since the last time was over).  We had an amazing day together.  We left around 10am and started out with pedicures (the 3rd time I’ve ever had one, thanks) and then headed over to Village Thrift. I am a dedicated thrifter and one of the things I miss the most about Philadelphia is all the amazing deals I can get.  We ate lunch and then started thrifting. (Yes, in my world, ‘thrift’ is a verb)  We actually ended up spending 5 hours in the store.  That’s right, 5 wonderful hours, wandering through the aisles, trying on clothes, chatting, gossiping… oh, and that would be with no children at our knees and no sense that we had to rush to get back to…. well, anything!  It was heaven!  Plus, I only spent about $20.00! Mindful of the space constraints, I ended up with only a groundhog beanie baby (I was born on groundhog day, plus they are Andre’s favorite animal), a pair of jeans and 2 tops, a book, four water guns and the game Twister (I know, you are thinking, Twister?? But, hey, according to wikipedia http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twister_(game) this game is nothing less than ‘sex in a box’.  Also, It was 85 cents, and brand new – I couldn’t resist!)

We had dinner and then went to a movie too (soooooo decadent) – we saw My Sister’s Keeper, which, as a parent, was terrifying (what if my kid gets cancer?) and depressing (I must have cried about 10 times) but a very good film nonetheless. I didn’t get home until after 10pm and all the kids were already asleep – what bliss!  It’s days like that that keep me going. Can’t wait until next year.

Meanwhile, back on the ranch, Andre’ and the kids spent the morning together doing essential chores like  ordering Zander’s birthday cake at Acme and purchasing Moose Tracks ice cream.  In the afternoon into the early evening they  went over to Heather’s house where Heather’s mom and Andre’ kept 7 kids occupied all afternoon – even though it was pouring rain all day long and NO outside play was possible!  Andre’ says he used the divide and conquer strategy to help them all get along, and it worked pretty well.  Zander had a great time building with Jackson’s Kinex and playing with Colin as well.  Take a look at the car he built in the video below.  Around 5 or so, Jeremy came home from work and helped out as well to get dinner together.  Then my crew headed over to Shana’s for bedtime.  Whew!

  

The next day we hung out with Shana, Greg, Ayla, Baz and Isa in the morning.  I love the video above of Griffin dancing with Ayla and Isa – obviously they prescribe to the ‘twirl around’ school of dance, whereas my son is more of a breakdancer type – Isa starts to get into his groove by the end though.  Then we headed over to almost the last item on our ‘have to do when we visit home’ list – Chuck E. Cheese – where, as the commercials claim, a kid can be a kid:  http://www.chuckecheese.com/ (and a parent can relax in air conditioning)  While there we met up  with Callie’s dear friend and most faithful pen pal, Cloe, and her mom Hana, plus her younger brother, Sam.  It was great to eat overpriced, greasy pizza and watch the kids have fun on lots of little games together.  Cloe took Callie home with her for a fun-filled afternoon of hanging out together while the rest of us hit a local thrift store for new hats and a few pieces of luggage to replace some stuff that was literally breaking to pieces after our sustained travels. On the way home from this I stopped off to say hello at The Big Backyard. This is the cooperative pre-school I have known and loved for about the past four years and I would say a MAJOR part of my existence for the 3 before I came to France.  In fact, I was the president for the 2007-2008 school year.  It was fun to see old familiar faces, especially Judith, the director, but it was also a bit strange for me. I guess, on a lot of levels, I thought of BBY as my home, and, returning, I realize I just plain don’t belong there any longer.  Oh strange inquietude…

In the early afternoon we headed over to one of only 3 circus schools in the entire country – the Philadelphia School for Circus Arts http://www.phillycircus.com/.  Located only a few minutes away from our home in Philly – it is a wonderful place to promote circus.  Also, it just happens to be owned by my amazing friend, Shana, (the one, left, way up in the silks) who we are staying with the next few days.  Go Shana!  We got to hang out there and spent a long time playing around in the school, mostly with the silks.  Griffin loved it, as you can see, but Zander was the most fascinated – I think circus class may be in his future when we come back home.  Of course, the silks are perfect for peek-a-boo as you can see with Isa, below left. The Kennedy Clan is just another amazing set of people to be around.  They have 3 little ones, just like us, and adore traveling. Shana and Greg were both trained in European circus schools.  Greg, Shana’s spouse, is a world famous juggler – see his website at http://www.innovativejuggler.com/ (and take the time to watch a video – you won’t regret it).  He was accepted as a major act in the next version of Cirque du Soleil – giant happy dance!  This means that, around the time we are returning to ‘normal’ US life, my good friends will be leaving to be a traveling circus family for 3-5 years. You thought we were adventurous? I’ve got nothing on these folks! We will miss them but can’t wait to hear all about their adventures abroad. We hung out that evening with the Kennedy’s while Daddie went to meet up with his AgilePhilly compatriots. Due to some miscommunications, he ended up spending about an hour and a half waiting outside a restaurant and eventually coming home only to find out his friends were at a table inside – how disappointing for all involved!  I felt especially sad, since I have been having so many wonderful opportunities to hang out with my friends this vacation. Poor Andre’ only had a solo trapeze act….

The next morning Andre’ and Shana ran in the local 5K called Run for the Hill of It along the Wissahickon.  I took a yoga class at my old gym, FitLife, and the kids hung with a babysitter.  We then had lunch at Pete’s  Pizza – cheesesteaks and Italian stromboli (both on our ‘must eat this while at home’ list) and then headed back to Gowen Circle for our final chance to hang with friends.  This was our way of reconnecting one last time with anyone that we didn’t get a chance to see up until that point, and to reconnect with many we had seen as well.  It started at 2:30 but we had no guests at all arrive for the first hour or so.   This was a major bummer to Zander, as you can see, since this was also sort of supposed to be his birthday party. We had told him it wouldn’t really be like a normal party – but he was hoping anyway!  Then the first person who showed up was my great old  college fencing teammate (they just keep on popping up, don’t they?), Jill!  I was so happy to see her – she has been fencing again and has lost tons of weight and just in general seems happy and great.  I was also glad to finally meet the kids of her significant other, Josh.  Soon afterwards, everyone started showing up.  I was especially happy to see Eric, one of Zander’s good friends from the Big Backyard and then, also, at Jenks.  I think he literally grew a foot since last summer!  Also there were: Heather’s family, Shana’s family, Catherine’s family, Cloe’s family, Phoebe’s family, Rodi’s family, Sienna’s mom Sara, and Julie’s family (I think I got everyone – there were lots of folks!)   I tried to get them to play a French game with us but it was hard getting everyone organized – I was lucky to even get them to be sort of still long enough for this photo, but here they are, on the hill next to our house.  Left to right we have: Pheobe, Alexa, Kara (standing), Callie, Noemie, Cloe, Eric, Jackson, Colin, Zander, Isa, Ayla, Baz, Peter, Joanna, Rachel and Griffin!  (Missing but at the party were Tyler, Eleanor, and Miriam)

Then we cleaned up and and headed over to the Trolley Car Diner for one last dinner – 3 or 4 families came with us and we walked.  It is funny how much the walk itself was valuable.  I really miss our little block!  So many of our neighbors had beautiful flowers and plants and it was great fun just to observe the kids holding hands, talking and bonding as they walked along the lane.  And, of course, then there was ‘the wall’.  This wall saved my life 2 summers ago when we had no car and I was walking everywhere.  The only way we made it up that final hill was the promise of a walk along the wall that runs at the edge of the New Covenant Campus.  Here are some shots of the kids walking along it.

               

     My only regret over this gathering was that I truly didn’t have enough time to chat with all the friends who came. I wish I could have spent hours and hours with you all.  Until next year, friends!

10. The House of Friends

After New Jersey we drove down to Maryland where my old college fencing teammate and long time best of friends, Deb, lives with her family.  In fact, my children refer to her, not as Deb, but as FriendDeb.  Her husband, Dave, is of course, FriendDave and they just recently had a baby that we call AlliPat (or FriendAlli).  She is absolutely amazingly adorable.  I knew this beforehand since I follow her website but of course we were so excited to finally meet her in person.  Deb took time off work just to be with us (sniff) and it was great to come to her house and see how cozy it has become. We felt especially welcomed to find so many pictures of us throughout the years hung up on their walls.

We went to a local lake the first day.  I have very fond memories of swimming around Lake Riconda with my old friend Julie Holmes as a kid.  There were so many fish, they used to nibble on our toes!  Of course, also, there was Shepherd’s Lake in Ringwood State Park, where my sisters were lifeguards and I worked in the summer as well.  Of course, I can’t remember the name of this lake, but it was fun to give the kids a chance to do some lake swimming – in the past we’ve only done either pools, rivers or oceans.   Except for Lake Powell, of course, which is just a whole ‘nother world entirely!

  

We had fun in the water.  AlliPat is already taking swimming lessons with Mom and loves the water. She and Callie had a great time playing together.  Then, of course, it was play in the sand time.  I can tell Dave is destined for greatness in the oh so important beach parenting arena by the way he was building sand shapes, including a stadium, a dog and, my personal favorite, a model of Stonehenge.  He did this in varying scales.  AlliPat – you are in for some fun beach times in the future, for sure. Meanwhile, Zander and Daddie did a castle together and Daddie also buried Griffin and Callie in the sand.  It’s all part of the onerous duty of being a father, folks.  I got to just go for a nice swim and sit around and admire my old friend doing the mom thing.  It is always great to talk with Deb and wonderful to see how happy her little arrival has made all three of them. (Even the pets, Shaggy, Cokey and Ned seem to be taking well to the new arrival!)

   

We headed home for dinner and the next day Andre’ took Zander, Callie and Griffin off to Washington DC for a short visit.  They had a great time together visiting the Air and Space Museum.   I was grateful, after 23 straight days with almost no rest, to have a day of peace, especially one with the Tross family.  I joined them on their dog walk, went out for a great lunch (ribs – yum) followed by ice cream (Ben and Jerry’s mint chocolate chunk – double yum) with just Deb.  I am so proud of her for being willing to leave AlliPat. I know this sounds awful – but I think having dates, going out, doing things without your baby sometimes is the key to parental sanity.  At least, it sure is for me.  I was having such a good time being my natural self, I didn’t even take one picture!   But Andre’ did a few in DC, for your viewing pleasure.

          

I am a huge fan of the Harry Potter books.  In fact, I read all of them out loud with Andre.  I can’t wait until my kids are old enough to get into these books – I do have one friend that is already reading them to her 4 and 6 year old, but I think I’m going to wait until Griffin is at least 6…    So, I love Harry -  but, at $9 or more per ticket, I’m too cheap for the movies!  So, I’d only seen the first two.  Deb and Dave have quite the enviable Hollywood collection. (I’ll admit here I have a very lazy fantasy, in which I come back one year, when THEY are on vacation, and my kids are somewhere else too and just sit with Andre’, watching movies and eating bon bons for like, a week).  In the afternoon, whilst Andre’ was still gone, I did watch the third Harry Potter, and Deb and Dave kindly let me borrow 4 and 5 so I would be ready to see 6 – now in theatres.   Of course, I didn’t watch them until we got back to France.  I was too busy (just like the rest of my visit with Deb and Dave) to do much but talk when I was still in the US.  I did find out that the movie here is only in French (no subtitles) so I think I will be waiting for the DVD for this one too.  I’m sure Deb and Dave will purchase it and then I can visit, see AlliPat grown a bunch bigger, and watch!

I would be totally remiss not to mention a few more things.  One is the pool table, Zander and Callie made their first attempts at pool while we were there (utterly cheating, of course) – and AlliPat found it absolutely hysterical.  I love that age, when they see something new and it just makes them laugh.  And, no matter what it is, no matter how foolish it makes you look, you do it, over and over, just to hear that giggle.  The second thing is the doggies.  We had a great time playing with our canine friends, Shaggy and Cokey.  Callie especially fell in love with Shaggy – who is a bit of a jumper so often scares kids.  Deb was glad he had a friend.   Last but not least, was Grandma Lou, FriendDave’s mom, who was there fr a visit as well.  It is always so nice to have a grandma around. Her and Griffin especially became good friends, as you can see by the giant hug.   I just  can’t believe things change so much and so fast.  Look at that cute little person in the bathtub – she like, came out, of FriendDeb!  Look at my kids – they are like, HUGE!  Life is so amazing, isn’t it?  Thanks guys – we love you!!!

9. Aunt Tina, Uncle Peter and Ayla

I have 3 sisters, and, for whatever reason, my kids have a hard time telling them apart at times.  I would say that, although we are sisters, we definitely do not look like twins. (OK, it’s true, we sound very alike, but still….) We are different heights, different weights and have different eye and hair colors, soooo, what’s the problem?  It has often been quite embarrassing when the kids call their aunts by the wrong names.  Of course, they have problems with other adults in their worlds, teachers, friends’ parents, etc…. that they see far more frequently, but that is not so embarrassing – because they are not actually related to me!  I do talk to them about their aunts and uncles often, try to help them remember, show pictures etc…., all to no avail.     It’s kind of incredible how I boil people down to (I hope) an easily remembered thing so they make a permanent connection in their little brains.  Aunt Melodie – the artist with lots of bracelets, Aunt Jennie – she is Lina and Livi’s mom and has the big old house and fencing school, Aunt Tina, she works in NYC and has a dog.  I wonder what my shorthand is…. Aunt Beckie, mom to Zander, Callie and Griffin, and lives in France?  You would think Jennie (my sister with children) would be the easiest for them to remember, because of their cousins, but, no, she was Aunt Melodie for half our visit this time.  Zander especially has a tough time remembering, except with Aunt Tina.  Ever since the third member of their family arrived, it has been easiest for him to remember her. That’s right, it’s all about the dog.  I admit it, Ayla is pretty beautiful.  I can’t wait to someday have a dog of my own.  Well, I take that back – I can definitely wait until I’m not living in France!

Zander was bit by a dog quite badly when he was about 3 years old and had, for a very long time, a serious (and understandable) hatred and fear of all dogs.  After we moved to Mt. Airy, he started to get over his ‘climb on the top of the nearest table if a dog appears’ level of fear since there were so many dogs all over, but was still very wary.  While here in France, he recently hung out with friends whose new puppy nibbled his toes, he decided he liked that and wanted a dog, but only if it would stay a puppy, like, forever, and would be a guaranteed toe-nibbler.  Hmmmm….. not so sure we could have pulled that one off!

Well, a big thanks now goes out to Tina, Peter and especially, Ayla, since after a weekend at their house Zander finally got over his fear of 5 years and fell in love with even grown up dogs everywhere (especially his canine cousin).    We accompanied Aunt Tina and Ayla on their daily walk in the forest first thing Saturday morning and  Zander was on Ayla like fleas on a dog (OK, perhaps that is a bad analogy, since Ayla actually is a dog, maybe I should have chosen ‘like white on rice’???).  He was clapping for her, whistling to her and exclaiming over her every little movement.  How she wagged her tail, bounded after a squirrel, splashed in a stream – you name it!  It was a lovely walk.

While Zander was dog-watching, Griffin was busy being ‘the leader’.  He really enjoys leading our hikes recently and walks as far in front of everyone as possible, often running to keep his distance.  He did absolutely great until the last half hour or so of our walk, when he ran out of steam and had to have a few rests!  You might be wondering what Callie was doing--talking Aunt Tina’s ear off is the only way to explain it.  I honestly don’t think she stopped long enough to do more than take a breath for over an hour.  I don’t even know what all they were talking about!  Callie also fell quite a bit in love with Ayla – who, although not really used to lots of rowdy kids, handled their presence with seemingly no qualms whatsoever – she even seemed a bit concerned about the kids and Tina said she was hanging a bit closer than usual – maybe she was listening to all that Zander clapping on some level or another.

           

Anyway, we had a great time hanging out with them the rest of the weekend. We did crafts, played games, did homework (yes, that’s right, I am having the children do homework as part of this vacation – I am terrified of their eventual return to the US – and they won’t know c-a-t spells cat!). We hung out in the back yard, had tacos (YUM) for dinner and were ever so happy to see the arrival of none other than Daddy!  That’s  right, he finally has rejoined our crew.  Hallelujah!   His journey took him through Penn Station so he paused to take a quick shot of the one and only New York Times building.  Every morning when he arrived at the top of these steps the newspaper vendors would be greeting the commuters with: ‘Good Morning, New York!”  The kids were so happy to see him, and so was I. 

Aunt Tina and Uncle Peter picked up a bike at a yard sale that is the perfect size for Zander.  I went out and bought him a helmet and he had a great bike ride around the park with Aunt Tina.  We played at the playground and got some ice cream from a truck, too. Zander, Callie and Griffin especially enjoyed the chance to be on the swings – a rarity in France and I was excited to hear how Tina and Peter have joined a local group to help improve the park.  Be the change, sister!

   

On Sunday we were happy to note Zander’s actual birthday. That’s right, he is officially 8 years old now – what a large number!  Aunt Melodie showed up (hooray) and she and Tina brought him out to Dunkin Donuts for a donut breakfast – complete with candles and song (in French and English, naturally).  Thanks, aunts!  Aunt  Melodie headed back home around 11 since, earlier that week, Uncle Jan had got into a car accident and was still recovering – poor Uncle Jan!  After lunch we went to a Shakespeare festival in another park not too far from their house.  I’m not sure what happened here, because I seem to have zero pictures of this day.  Did I forget my camera?  Did those pictures somehow get lost while transferring from my camera to the computer??? Frustrating! 

One great thing we did was climbing in an awesome tree with some other families.  I was saying something to Zander when another mom, standing nearby, said “Zander? Is that your son’s name?”  When I replied  affirmatively she went on to tell me how her son was also named Zander.  Cool!  One thing led to another and we ended up chatting for about 5 minutes and companionably watching our kids climb a giant tree.

I mention this incident only because it just shows how different people in the US are from people in France – In France, no one ever has struck up a conversation with me on a line, or in a playground.  No one. Ever.  The culture is just so much more closed in that way. Conversation with random people was actually one of the nicest things I experienced while visiting home. I guess that’s part of the reason I feel so lonely all the time.

We then moved on to the festival which had live actors doing plays and a Punch and Judy show.  If you have never seen Punch and Judy, you might be a bit surprised at what it is like.  I know I was a bit shocked. During the show that we saw, Punch did terrible things like throw babies down the stairs, beat people with sticks, kill them and get away with it all.  It’s quite dry, quite sarcastic and terribly funny – but it just goes to show that violence has been a part of entertainment for children for a very, very, very long time!  In spite of my vow to not do research and get caught up on blogging, I looked up Punch and Judy – the wikipedia article is here http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Punch_and_Judy and states, among other things, that this thing has been around for about 400 years –  (originally it was for adults, it has only been thought of for children for about 200 years) Read this excerpt….

“The show typically involves Punch behaving outrageously, struggling with his wife Judy and the Baby, and then triumphing in a series of encounters with the forces of law and order (and often the supernatural). The classic ending of the show has him upending the Devil himself, exclaiming "Huzzah huzzah, I've killed the Devil!".

All is performed in the spirit of outrageous comedy and is intended to provoke shocked laughter.

The stereotypical view of Punch casts him as a deformed, child-murdering, wife-beating psychopath who commits appalling acts of violence and cruelty upon all those around him and escapes with impunity – holding fascination and appeal for both children and adults.”

I was fascinated, that’s for sure.  This is just the kind of stuff I want my kids exposed to  - good old fashioned values, right?

After this we wandered around a bit had an artery clogging American-style lunch (which included fresh made fried tortilla chips that were the best, like, ever) and Zander got a chance to fight with a knight.  The teenage volunteer, dressed in medieval costume, wielded a sword and basically let the children who paid 3 bucks beat the crap out of him.  We watched a few kids before and after Zander and, frankly, they were ruthless – they attacked aggressively (some after initial hesitation but most dove right in) and even when the knight was down, begging for mercy, they didn’t stop, whaling him over and over with their Styrofoam weapons until pulled away by laughing parents. 

When Zander came up, he fought bravely, but, I say with pride, with honor.  If the knight slipped, dropped his weapon, or fell to his knees Zander, quite politely, stepped back and let him regain his footing before beginning again.  He clearly was having a great time fighting – but was also very concerned about the well being of the other combater.  Chivalry, my friends, is not (quite) dead. A true gentleman, my son!

That night we spent some time watching the Tour de France on TV with Tina and Peter.  They are huge Tour fans, especially Peter, of Lance Armstrong and really enjoy watching.  It was amazing to see these guys zipping right through our home town of Besancon on their bikes.  Only comes through our town once every 50 years or so and we are here instead of there – oh well!  I would rather be with my sister, her husband, and, of course, their dog!

We miss them already.